1/16/08

I have tried working on the letter to myself. It has been hard and a little overwhelming. Looking at pictures of me when I was in middle school has been hard. Thinking about how much pain that girl is going through is the toughest. I decided to do group again(this was group #2)! I am really nervous about it. I felt like I needed that extra support, since my family doesn't know, so I e-mailed some people from SOLE. So far only one person has written back. That and what Sister Parker wrote really means a lot to me. She wrote "Hi there! Wow is all I can say. I love you and I am very proud of you. It takes a lot of courage to face reality. I know Heavenly Father is wrapping his arms around you right now. If I was there I would too!" I was just looking at a quilt I made as a teenager with mom b and my sister. I remember working on it and finishing it. When when we were done sister and I put them on our beds and mom b yelled at us that we weren't supposed to use them. So it has been sitting in the closet for almost 10 years. I saw it and got it out, thinking maybe I should use it. As I laid it out I decided that I couldn't, it was too painful.