Tuesday, February 17, 2015

2/17/15

Our family has been going through some changes. My husband got a new job and with that my job is going from full-time at the office to (hopefully) part-time from home! I could not be more excited about this. However, I do have 1 fear about this- my depression! Before I had kids I literally did nothing all day. I would sleep until 12 or even 2 or 3 and then just watch TV. When I had little ones (we did Foster Care so sometimes I would have a little one for a few months and then go back to not) it gave me a reason to get up in the mornings, more like forced me to get up in the morning. 5 years ago we got our daughter, thus I've been forced to get up with her and then her brother in the mornings. Over the past 2 years that I've been working my kids have become so independent that they don't need me in the mornings. Heck, as much as I tell them to come wake me up when they get up, they don't! But still, I've had my job and have been forced to get up and go to work. I've been worried that without my job forcing me to get up and my self-reliant kids wanting to do their own thing I would end up sleeping all day and sinking back into that deep depression.

The good thing is, I'm finally in a place where I can acknowledge the depression and see the sleeping as a problem. If anyone else is like me, it doesn't matter how much your alarm goes off in the morning, or even if people text you, you just ignore it and keep on sleeping. Doesn't help that I have zero motivation! I decided that find a way to force myself to get out of bed in the morning! My idea- when my alarm (cell phone) is on my night stand and my alarm goes off all I have to do is roll over and snooze it so I moved it as far away from me as possible forcing me to get up and deal with it! Maybe it's that I didn't sleep at night the night before (thanks a lot depression!) but day 1 was a success! In fact I was the first person up in the house! We'll see how it goes from here! Wish me luck!

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