The past few days have been crazy. Monday night (June 30) my dad blew up at me. He said a lot of things that hurt. He even said, "I know about you and Sister Parker and how she is your new mother!" (I had written that she was like a mom to me) I freaked out, he had to of read my journal. I was so mad at him I could of killed either him or me, luckily I did neither. (this is the night I started cutting, also note there is a lot of unwritten stuff leading up to this)
Up until last night I was still upset and very discouraged. I seriously thought that no one really cared about me. At least no one alive in my life that really mattered.
I went to sleep still out of it, I had what I call a "symbolic" dream. I was standing in this all white room. In it there was a few different people, the only one I really remember is Sister Parker. Every person in the room came up one by one and said, "I care about you."
Just this has pulled me out of it, I almost did something I regret Monday night. I learned never to do that again. (cutting) This dream has really helped me, it has helped me hang on just another day. To know that someone out there and a few others, really do care about me in my life right now.
I felt like even my future family wasn't good enough to live for. I know that it is...
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